So, I almost wasn’t born.  I was reminded of this recently when a dear friend of mine prayed with me.  As she was praying and declaring God’s promises over me, she said, “even in your mother’s womb, God went back a few times to re-knit you.”  I could have listened to what she was saying and pass it over as nothing.  But the pit in my stomach was telling me different.  It was the Spirit of God, He was telling me that my friend was speaking to a deep place in me where, long ago God in fact, did just that.  He re-knit me. 

After this time of prayer with my friend, I began to ask God why He showed me this.  Why now Lord and what does this mean?  I often ask God to reveal His heart to me so I can pray.  Well, He decided to answer that prayer this day and my heart broke.  He began sharing His heart with me for our nation.  We’re going deep here folks so hang on.

I am writing in the month of October; the year is 2020.  The atmosphere is extremely heavy.  Chaos has been unleashed on America.  And yet, God is at work.  He is moving amongst us.  He’s speaking, trying to get our attention.  Don’t be distracted from what God is doing in the spirit.  Sometimes we have to look beyond the circumstances all the while keeping our eyes on Jesus.  I will always encourage you to ask Him directly about any topic.  Go to Him, ask for wisdom and He will guide you.  I promise. 

Lately, God has been speaking to me about Him and a political subject matter.  He hasn’t asked me to speak about politics, just about Him.  Sometimes they do merge though, particularly with this topic and we must look at it from God’s perspective.  So, here we go. 

Here’s a few things God has been speaking that I wanted to share.  God loves America.  God is fighting for America and declares that America will be saved.  As believers of God, we should be living 2 Chronicles 7:14, “if My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land.”  Every day we choose whether this truth will reign in our life or not.  Will we humble ourselves, our opinions, our wants, our desires…for God’s wants and desires?  Will we truly seek God?  Will we abide by His ways?  Will we set aside our agenda and ask Him for wisdom?  This is so important.  Are you willing?  Are you willing to humble yourself?  Your opinion?  Your wants?  Your desires…for God’s?  Will you…truly seek God?  Will you abide by His ways?  Are you willing, to set aside your agenda?    

Thousands gathered on the National Mall in Washington D.C. the weekend of September 26, 2020 and millions watched online with one purpose:  to individually, corporately, nationally and globally repent and move forward together for worldwide revival.  You can watch a replay of the event here: 

https://www.thereturn.org/.

Another group of believers gathered 2 weeks later in Ohio to pray for our nation. 

As I participated in these conferences online and during the time of repentance, the 60,000,000 aborted lives weighed heavy on my heart.  I began to talk to God about it.  Sixty million Lord?  Really?  That’s the number?  Lord, that just can’t be right.  I heard Him say, Okay, Melissa, what if the number was half of that?  Thirty million.  Does that feel better?  Ouch.  I wept.  And I wept some more.

Jesus weeps every day for these lives.  My thoughts about this subject continued.  Why is it okay for women to choose murder?  God, forgive us.  I wept a little more.  I point no fingers.  I judge no one.  Thankfully God’s blood that He shed for us covers all our sins.  Lord, we ask for your protection over our nation, yet we don’t honor your instructions.  If we want to be a nation under God, with all of His protection, with all of His provision, with all of His character…we cannot have the freedom to murder.  And, our judicial system that governs this nation must come into agreement with life and not death, abortion cannot be allowed from the highest court of our nation.

Psalm 139 verse 13 says, “For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb.”  God is the creator of all life.    

I want to share about my own life and how God used my life and my pregnancies to speak to me about this topic.  My first pregnancy was not a good pregnancy.  After about three years of going through infertility, finally there was a heartbeat.  You can imagine the excitement Brett and I experienced.  Finally.  It was a long time of praying and our promise was finally in my belly.  It was a short-lived pregnancy when the heartbeat faded over time and eventually stopped.  We grieved our daughter and named her Hope.  I believe I will see her one day in heaven.

My second pregnancy also was not a good pregnancy but ended before we could hear a heartbeat.  After this loss, tired and exhausted, my husband and I met with our doctor for next steps.  This was now our third infertility doctor, who by the way, was the top doctor at the University of Pennsylvania (special thanks to my mother-in-law who worked there).  I asked him, “If I was your daughter, what would you tell me?”  The doctor paused and said, “We can’t explain it, but your body is simply acting older than it actually is.  You should have 8 eggs a month for your age and you only have 1-3.  Take your money and go home.  You have less than a 1% chance of ever getting pregnant.”  We left that office heart broken.  I thought, all of our efforts, over a three-year period, for naught.  To say our hearts were downtrodden was an understatement!  Until…my husband turned to me and said, “Well, it’s up to God now.”  I released a huge sigh of relief.  Brett spoke words of hope.  Although we were discouraged, Brett’s declaration reminded me that we serve a BIG God.  Our hope was in Jesus and our hearts were encouraged.  It’s not saying it was easy.  But, we had hope.

When I began seeking God as a teenager and hearing His voice, God spoke to me about my daughter.  I was 17 years old and God told me something about “my future daughter.”  What He said always stuck with me.  He gave me hope and 21 years later I was able to hang on to this hope as we were trying to conceive.  See, I knew I would have and raise a daughter because God said so.  I believed Him.  I just didn’t know how it would happen.  Would she come from my womb or another’s womb through adoption?  Three months after stopping infertility treatments, I was pregnant with Ella.  Ella is now 6 years old.  And, God deserves ALL the glory.  My husband declared at Ella’s dedication to the Lord, “When the doctors said no, God said yes.”  Amen to that!    

Now, about my life in my mother’s womb.  My mother tells me that when she was pregnant with me, the doctor gave her some bad news.  At every doctor’s appointment, he would say, “You know, this isn’t a good pregnancy.  You’re going to lose this baby.”  She was in and out of the hospital 3-4 times, had multiple infections in her body and blood as well as a couple of blood transfusions.  But I was persistent (or should I say, God was insistent!).  Thankfully, God turned it all around and the only bad news ended up being that she was hospitalized so much that she said it was too hard to take care of her long hair and therefore one of the first things she did after I was born, was cut her hair.  Sorry Dad.  (He loved her long hair!)  She reminds me today that I was persistent and stubborn, hmmmm…. some things never change, ha ha!

Was my heartbeat not strong enough?  Was I not as active in the womb?  I’m not sure what markers were used to determine that “this was not a good pregnancy.”  However, what if my mother was given the choice to abort me?  I couldn’t imagine the trauma my mother would have had to endure given that choice at any point during her pregnancy.  Thankfully, she wasn’t given that choice and her motherly intuition told her that everything would be just fine.  And everything was fine.  I was born a completely healthy baby with fiery red hair and green eyes. 

I think about the scripture that says God forms us in our mother’s womb.  Were their complications and God had to go back and set things in alignment with His will in my mother’s womb?  Perhaps.  Did He heal something that wasn’t quite right?  Perhaps.  All of these questions are added to the list of questions I have for Him when I see Him!

So why write about this topic?  Because it matters to God.  And 60,000,000 is enough!  It’s enough. 

God is still in the business of miracles.  I have seen many but let’s stick to the issue of life.  I was not supposed to be born, thank God for the miracle of life.  Ella, my daughter, is another example, thank God for the miracle of life.  It is time to declare life not death and take hold of all God has for us as people and a nation.  I want to be a nation under God, with all of His protection, with all of His provision, with all of His character.  I want to live in a nation, and I want my daughter to grow up in a nation where the judicial system governs according to God’s principles.  Multiple sources of history confirm that America is a nation established and built by men and women who sought and honored God.  You think this isn’t possible today?  Then you’re serving a god that is too small!

“But Jesus looked at them and said to them, “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”  Matthew 19:26

Let’s pray together!

Prayers You Can Pray: 

• Father, focus my prayer today where it should be and break my heart for what breaks Yours!  Open my eyes to see from your perspective.  I pray I would be obedient to joining you where you are already at work.  Search my heart so no evil or biased opinion that is against You is found in me.  I pray that my mind would be on the things of God versus the things of man.  Give me wisdom to vote how You would want me to vote in this election.  I seek You for wisdom and set aside my opinions.  Lord, I trust in you with my whole heart, I lean not on my own understanding.  In all my ways I acknowledge You and ask that you direct my path.  (Proverbs 3:5-6)
• I pray for those who felt the need to make this very tough decision of abortion.  Restore them to you Lord.  Heal the deep part of their hearts that are longing for love, hope and forgiveness.  Wrap your huge arms around them and comfort them as they ask for forgiveness.  God, I know you love them beyond measure with an everlasting love.      
• Lord, I agree with America’s founding father’s declaration for the right of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness for all.  Jesus, I plead your blood over my sins and the sins of my nation.  God, end abortion, and send revival to America.  I decree that all of America’s children will live and not die and will proclaim the goodness of God!  I decree that America will choose life and America will be saved.